Confinement’s over – bring out the champagne!

Yippie, it’s over! Or is it?!

Well, the confinement part is but the next challenging one is handling a toddler with a newborn which is on-going till the newborn isn’t newborn anymore, I guess. And then that would be another new challenge altogether.

Anyway, back to the confinement first. I’ve done myself proud with only washing my hair 3 times this round (I washed my hair 5 times during Rye Li’s). Now, I’m only waiting for the right time to chop off my hair – I’ve been dying to cut it real short throughout the pregnancy but only withstand it as I need to tie it up during the confinement.

This time also didn’t feel as bad as the last as I wasn’t really confined, having to send Rye Li to and fro from the daycare and also there were that few times where I had to pick my urut lady up from the commuter station.

I’ve had my fair share of ups and downs as well during this confinement but I won’t go into the details for fear of offending anyone. I’ve already ‘blasted’ what I wanted to say in previous posts and I shall leave it as it is.

So what did we do for the full moon? Well, just like Rye Li’s, we distributed full moon packages (forgot to take pictures of it) to friends and relatives on Friday. On Saturday, we had our family over for some food at home and since we had so much leftovers, we also invited some friends except that only one family could turn up due to the last minute invitation. Hehe.

Ok, now the challenging part. I didn’t really get to do my work throughout this one month, only managing some emails now and then. I still owe a fair bit to my clients. I thought I would have some time during the day time but unfortunately (or maybe fortunate) that Haye Li is a more demanding baby than her sister. She needs to be carried around daytime and weirdly enough, she will sleep on her own evening onwards. And there is no way I will work at nights as I don’t get enough sleep already and I can’t really sleep daytime with a demanding baby.

So where is this leading to? Well, I’m really thankful that I have the daycare to send Rye Li to daytime throughout the weekdays and I only have her at nights and weekends. And this is also enough to send me up the wall handling a toddler and a baby at the same time. It is worst when hubby is not around!

I’m also grateful for having a maid this time. She’s not the perfect maid, she has her own flaws but at least she does the cleaning around the house and that means a lot to me too.

I cannot imagine having to go back to office in 4 weeks time – not sure how will I cope then. I’m more worried as to whether I can keep up with the milk supply for Haye Li. I am determined to also breastfeed her for at least a year just like Rye Li but with me having to see clients out of office will be a challenge for me. I will see where this will lead me to when I return to office.

I’m also worried with the way hubby travels, whether I can cope with two kids or not. I know there’s the maid but the thing is, I don’t let her handle the kids. I do let her with some stuff for Rye Li, if she lets her but definitely not the baby. No thanks to her weak health too (she has been sick 3 times with us so far and this is her 5th month!). And she has this dry cough that has not gone away since day 1 when we picked her up. Not sure if we will still have her after next month or not as I will need to take her for another x-ray checkup. If her x-ray shows negative, I can have the option of changing her with the agent but hubby did remind me that I will have to start all over again with the new maid and we don’t know whether we can trust her also. At least this one, I can trust her to a certain extent. Oh well, we will also see how it goes next month.

Hubby is away this whole week, for 6 nights and this is one of the longest so far with us having two kids. Rye Li took it quite badly as she has grown closer to her papa during my pregnancy with Haye Li and also ever since Haye Li came out. The first night, I really had to attend to her and let’s put it this way, while I was nursing Haye Li, I was also feeding Rye Li her dinner! She was really cranky then and only wanted me and no one else.

So, I am wondering how I will cope handling 2 kids when I go back to work but knowing us women, nothing is impossible when we’re faced with challenges alone. I sure hope so! :D

A breastfeeding moment

I have to blog about this….since Haye Li is still small although she has put on some weight, none of the mittens we have can really fit her so most of the times she go mitten-less.

So when I was nursing her just now on my left boob, I just let her be while I was watching TV. When I looked down on her, her left hand was against her upper cheek and she was showing me the finger! I just burst out in laughter and wished my camera was with me then.

This kinda made my day coz it made me laugh….something I really need these days!

Who is it that has given birth in the house?!!!

Please don't ask me!

Everyone in the house behaves as if they have given birth and they get much more sleep than I do!

There, I just need to get that out! Another 6 days to go and I'm out of the house!

Mastitis updates

Because the lumps are not going away and it still hurts while nursing and breastfeeding, I went to see the infamous Dr. Koe this morning and I was really impressed with her. I’ve heard about her over 3 years ago but never needed to see her till today. All this while, I thought she was only a Lactation Consultant but I found out this morning online that she’s a Pediatrician cum Lactation Consultant. I was thinking of going alone after dropping Rye Li off the daycare but when I found out she was also a Paed, I brought along Haye Li and MIL.

And it was a good thing I brought Haye Li as not only my visitation is under her name but Dr. Koe corrected on how I’ve been breastfeeding Haye Li all this while. She is so patient and really spent her time with us. Think we spent a good 45 minutes with her and she only charged me RM81 (which RM56 was my antibiotics and I also had a eye drop for the girl’s eye discharge which she had since she was born). So much cheaper than SJMC I must say! I’m thinking now of bringing the girls to her for their jabs but if any emergencies of flu and fever, SJMC is still nearer to our place.

I felt good walking out from Dr Koe’s clinic, as if I’ve achieved something. I must recommend for any moms who are not confident in breastfeeding to see her, something I regretted not doing with Rye Li!

I’m going to digress a bit….on the way to my car from the clinic, we passed several coffee shops with many hawker outlets and I had good whiffed of Char Kuey Teow (Fried Flat noodles) and it smelled damn good! I don’t fancy this at all during normal times but I guess this is what 3 weeks of confinement does to you! I know what I will be looking for in a week’s time! :D

Blocked ducts + Fever = Mastitis = Pain!

Breastfeeding, can it get any better?!

Two days ago, I experienced some blocked ducts on my left and it was painful nursing Haye Li or while pumping but I continued anyway as I need to empty it in order to get better. Then at night, I started having fever. This is a first time for me. I've experienced blocked ducts with Rye Li before but never fever.

I didn't dare take Panadol then so I was having fever through the night while suffered in pain when nursing Haye Li. Morning came and my fever was 39.3 degrees and I felt I better do something about the fever. Thanks to my friend, who also experienced Mastitis before, told me that I could take panadol and I did.

I also called my doctor and I remembered that he was away for a seminar this week so I spoke to his senior nurse who advised me if the fever didn't go away after taking panadol in the morning, I should go in and see a doctor. By noon, my fever broke and so I didn't bother going into the hospital. But when the panadol wore off, it came back and so I took panadol again.

At the mean time, I still fed Haye Li with the affected boob (which was excrutiating painful!) and used hot towel on it while massaging it as well (thanks to my friend's advice). Evening came and my fever came back but nursing or pumping wasn't as painful as in the morning. But I had new lumps. In the middle of the night, I was still having low grade fever but I didn't take panadol and decide to only take it in the morning if there is still fever.

My fever is gone for the moment but the lumps are still there. It still hurts to nurse or pump and also while massaging but it wasn't as painful as the first time. I will still take panadol later as I'm having a big headache too, probably from all the sweat from the breakout of the fever. My appetite has worsen and I asked MIL to cook some soup today so I can replenish on the liquids lost. Also, the quantity of milk from the affected boob as totally worsen and takes like forever to have a let-down. I'm wondering when will it get back to normal as I need to resume my stock-keeping.

I'm hoping the fever doesn't return and that the lumps will be gone soon as I would hate to start taking antibiotics for it. Also, going to the doctors now when hubby is not around is really troublesome. But of course if it doesn't get better by tomorrow, I will have to go see a lactation doctor and would probably bring Haye Li and MIL with me.

This experience really questioned me whether I want to continue with breastfeeding or not as I've not experienced such pain before and fever too. But I need to persevere as I need to think of Haye Li's well-being more than anything - I will definitely remind her of this experience when she's old enough to understand.

Breastfeeding

This post is dedicated to both of my daughters. As much as I love you both so much, I need you two to know how much your mummy went through just to breastfeed the both of you! And it’s a good thing too that you two are females as you both will go through it one day too. :D

I have to admit that both my daughters are hopeless when it comes to breastfeeding them. Let’s start with Rye Li first.

Rye Li was immediately brought to me after she was cleaned up when I just delivered her. I was surprised as to how she knows how to latch on immediately and she managed to suckle one side for about 10 minutes before she was brought away.

I only got to attempt at breastfeeding her like 6 hours later after that and it was a struggle already as she prefers sleeping most of the time. The nurse and I had to find ways to wake her up, at times it worked but most times it didn’t. The two nights at the hospital saw me waking her up for feeds most of the time. And it was the same at home too.

Although Rye Li latches on well, my nipples were still sore and soon the engorgement came in and I suffered as this girl only drinks like 2-5 minutes before dozing off. No matter how much effort was made to wake her for more milk, this girl never awoke from slumber land. And this led to the beginning of my pumping journey. After every time she drinks off me, I need to continue with pumping or else I would suffer from the engorgement.

In the beginning, and for several months after that, every time she latched on, I would squeal in silence as it hurt a lot.

For the record, I never knew what it was like to have my breast emptied by a baby as Rye Li never drank more than 10 minutes of me throughout her 1 year breastfeeding journey. At least I’m glad she never treated me like a pacifier (probably due to the fact that she sucks her thumb from 4-5 months old till today).

Oh yes, I was telling everybody then how she treated me like a ‘straw’. Once she latched on, she would drink a little, then let go, and then drink again, and then let go as if she knew the ‘straw’ was there all the time at her convenience. This was why I never breastfed her in public! Also, you can imagine how messy it was when my breasts are full and she let’s go during her feeds. There were times I really wanted to smack her hard for her bad sucking habits (which I’m convinced it also led to her bad eating habits till today!) but since she was a little innocent baby then, I just couldn’t find myself to and suffered in silence!

Because Rye Li doesn’t finish her milk of me, we always brought out the expressed breast milk (EBM) out with us when we go out. And we have to work around my pumping schedule so it took forever for us to get ready to go out as not only we need to feed her before we leave, we have to get her stuff ready and I also have to pump. So our outings were not for very long too, the most 5 – 6 hours or so as I needed to come back home to pump again. Those days, I envied moms who conveniently pull up their bra just to feed their babies in public as they don’t need to bring out so many stuff with them or rush back to pump.

Rye Li also doesn’t like frozen EBM. I guess it was my fault that I didn’t train her early with it and mostly gave her fresh EBM. And I struggled keeping up with the supply as we can’t store fresh EBM for long compared to frozen ones. In the end, I threw away a lot of frozen EBM. I did use them to mix with fresh ones and also to make her cereals but there were a lot in the freezer and I couldn’t use all of them. From this experience, I vowed to train my next baby early on frozen EBM so that I won’t be so stressed out on keeping up with supply.

Now that Haye Li has come along, I was praying hard that her drinking habits are way better than her sister’s. This is somewhat true but still, I also find her hopeless like her sister!

At the delivery room, it took some time for Haye Li to latch on me. She was more keh poh chi (busybody) with her surroundings than to latch on. After coaxing her like several minutes or so, she finally latched on and I got her to suckle off both breasts too for like half hour before she was taken away from me.

When it was time to feed her again at the hospital, this girl didn’t really latch on properly and when I started to correct her, she got so furious and started screaming (she is way louder than her sister!). I guess it is my fault for not correcting her from the start so again, I suffered.

When we got home, my nipples were already sore and cracked and by the 3rd night home, both my nipples were bleeding. My first time as I didn’t get this from Rye Li. So I suffered that few days till it healed by itself and till today, my nipples are still sore. At least it is not cracked anymore.

Haye Li definitely drinks more than Rye Li and at least when she sleeps on them, she is still sucking. At the hospital, I was wondering whether she was actually drinking or treating my like a pacifier as I couldn’t hear the swallowing sounds from her. But now, I can so I know she is still drinking in her sleep until she will totally let it go herself. However, just like her sister, she also doesn’t finish off. Well, she could finish off one breast but when I put her on the other, she is already dead asleep.

So my pumping is more to empty the other breast and also so that I can start storing them up. I’m too lazy now to pump in the middle of the nights (second time breastfeeding doesn’t give you that painful engorgements) but I think I have to start soon as not only I need to keep up with supply, this girl is becoming like her sister in that she is drinking 5-10 minutes before dozing off and hence, she is waking up like every hour or every one and a half hour. After my confinement is over, I will start giving her EBM in the bottle through the nights so she will drink more and sleep longer. Only thing is that I will need to pump after giving her the EBM.

There have been several occasions where she has drank for half an hour and I was able to have her to drink off both breasts, something I didn’t achieve with Rye Li. But lately, she is drinking like 5 minutes and then let go and don’t want anymore. But when I put her down, she cries for milk. This girl is definitely more demanding than her sister.

This girl also has started treating me like a ‘straw’ and I’m wondering are all babies like this or just mine are like this? If mine are like this, I would think it’s from hubby’s genes as I knew I’m a very good eater when I was young while he was a fussy eater! :D

She doesn’t open her mouth big to latch on, just her pouty lips so she’s literally ‘sipping’ of my ‘straws’ and it also hurts each time she latches on and I will still squeal in silence. During Rye Li’s time, I usually went “ow, ow, ow” but now I don’t as Rye Li is mostly around me when I nurse Haye Li and I wouldn’t want her to think that Haye Li is hurting me.

Anyway, I’m praying that Haye Li gets better at drinking off me as I would hate to work around my pumping schedule over the weekends again.

Motherhood, you just have to love it don’t you?! But my stance is still clear, after going through what a woman should go through, I still want to be a boy in my next life! :D

Being confined

It’s been nearly 2 weeks and how has it been so far? Hot, hot and hot! I need a hair wash again only having to wash it on Saturday. I’ve managed to last 10 days this time round. I wanted to try 12 days but I just couldn’t as I felt there was a mini zoo in my hair already! With Rye Li, I only managed 8 days so this is a better attempt. LOL.

During the first week, I was alone with the maid mostly while Rye Li was at the daycare and hubby at work. Yes, he had to work that week as he has a new boss that just came in. Initially, he was supposed to take the week off since his parents couldn’t come till last weekend. They were in Medan for a holiday booked earlier and we didn’t want them to forego it just for me.

My food was well taken care off by my parents as well as hubby over the first weekend. I had packets of frozen vinegar pork leg in the freezer as a standby if hubby couldn’t cook for me.

Hubby had to be away for a night in the first week and I had to send Rye Li to the daycare for one and a half days. He asked me to leave her at home but there was no way I wanted her to as I don’t think I can cope with 2 of them alone at home. The maid? Well, she was with me and she had the flu again so having her to take care of Rye Li was also not an option and has never been. Lucky for me, Haye Li slept all the way to and fro in the car. Even when the in-laws are in town, I will still send Rye Li to the daycare when hubby is travelling except that I won’t be bringing Haye Li with us.

I’ve started pumping (will do a separate post on my 2nd breastfeeding journey when I can) so MIL could feed Haye Li if needed.

I’ve also started my urut (malay: massage) and it hurts like hell! I don’t like the oily stuff and after each session, I really have to wipe myself down. The lady was nice and patient enough to allow me to nurse Haye Li in between the sessions. During Rye Li’s time, my MIL would be feeding Rye Li with my expressed milk then. She will do this with Haye Li next week onwards when I continue my urut.

It does help having a maid as she does the washing, cleaning the house and all. I realize this time that I don’t think I will get to dress Haye Li in all the baby clothes I got (I received more hand-me-downs) as the maid washes them Only thing about my maid is that I don’t allow her to handle Haye Li so it has all been me since Day 1.

Not only I nurse her, I change and bathe her too. It has been manageable so far and now that my in-laws are here, I’m still doing this. At least I can have them to oversee Haye Li when I need to go to the toilet, etc instead of depending on the maid.

This confinement doesn’t feel as bad as the previous one so far (guess coz I’ve been going out but only to send Rye Li to and fro to the daycare) but I’m still counting to the days where I don’t have to follow the confinement stuff anymore. I do so want my ice cream! LOL but I will probably wait till very much later since I’m breastfeeding and I’m not sure whether this girl will be colicky like her sister or not. I sure hope not!

Another 16 days to go!